Why Blog Now?

Why??... The other day while meditating with my BIO and her boo. She told me something that opened my eyes. My sister advised me the following:

My Bio- Jodie

"When you were in college, you had so much self esteem. You were always dressed hair done. You were the llife of the party. No one could stop you cause you knew you were bad! When i came to VA to live with you and you were wearing baggy shirts and jeans, no heels, no nothing! "

This was not a slap in the face but an eye opener. I had been miserable in my own skin for to long. The fact that other people saw my issues, especially my little sister, made me know that I had to get it back but she wasn't alone. At work my coworker and Homie Asia saw it to. Jodie got me up and caring about my hair and Asia got me back on my sexy:

Me and Asia

So here I am.

Take me as I am!

Special Thanks

Me           MY BFF

I want to take this time to say a special thanks to the person that got me started on this journey. Not blogging but weight lost! My BFF Heather challenged me to lose weight with her. She wasn't as big as me but she was just as upset and uncomfortable. We started with the Atkins diet.... OMG! I know. We were warned by many people of things it could do. But the thing it did was make me lose 30lbs in a month and half. It was great but i was a cheater and wanted more.

She continued her battle with weight loss and even had a baby. Heather is the bomb because she saw what she wanted and shes almost there. I am getting there. My last weigh in said I was 162.2 and I am no longer considered OBESE!!! That was a great point in my life.

Thanks Bestie... We aren't as close as we were in the past but we will be there together again.... just alot skinner!

Herstory: College and beyond... Part 2

2003- 2007 Virginia State University- College
It didn't take me long to realize that the things that I needed when I was in MA was not the things I wanted or cared about it VA. I went out and played Volleyball and when I advised that we would have 5am practice I advised that i couldn't continue as I love to sleep!!! I had all intentions when entering college to continue to be in shape. I was no longer devoted to working out or volleyball. So I said my goodbyes and went back to what I loved... Track! 1 problem I am an asthmatic child from Massachusetts running track in Virginia heat.... it just didn't work out so I focused on classes. Needless to say, by the end of my first semester I was 1/2 way to my freshmen 15. Whats freshmen 15? Freshmen 15 was first explained to me by my older brother who advised me that upper class males would try to sleep with 15 different incoming freshmen. That is not what I mean. Freshmen 15, for purposes of this blog, is the 15lbs that most freshmen females put on due to stress and unhealthy eating habits. Skipping breakfast grabbing a burger in Foster Hall was catching up to me quickly. My metabolism slowed down and for the first time I saw my self getting thick. At first I was so excited!!!! I was finally rounding out like all my other black female friends. My boobs went from a 34B to a 34 D... That caused me no stress but at the end of sophomore year I was a 36 D and I began to get worried. 2003- 2007 was a battle in its self. My parents divorced and although I was 500 miles away I was thrown right in the middle. No one really talks about stress causing weight gain but I know for me it contributed. My college days ended with me weighting in at 170lbs and with a gym membership and a bachelor's degree in psychology in hand I was going to lose this weight and fix my head.

Where track and field was my past time in high school, shopping and eating became the focus in college. Upon completion of college I was unhappy that i let myself go. I hated track, I hated shopping and I was beginning ,for the first time in my life, to hate my BODY! Now my psych degree is only a bachelors so i am not able to diagnose anyone. But if I could I would advise you all that I had a very mild case of body dimorphic. Yes I was fat, but not as I fat as I thought I was but worse was that in my mind I still saw a size five and when I tried to pull those jeans up and the refused my life went on a downward spiral.

2007-2009
I found out in June 2007 I was prego! OH NO! You must be crazy, I've been losing weight! Once again another thing no one told me. You can lose weight in the beginning of your pregnancy and oh yea.... you can prego on birth control pills even if you've taken them for 4 yrs!!! From 170- 210.... My journey began January 1, 2009

Herstory: High School... Part 1

1999-2003 Springfield Central High School- High School

Life was so much simpler in these days. I went to school, worked when I wanted to and ate whatever I wanted... WHENEVER~ Volleyball, soccer, track and field and cheerleading. I played a sport every season since I was a child. I danced and acted and was full of life. As I look back now I can see when I changed. My parents went through a messy split when I was in the 11th grade and that is when I made sports my life. I would work out all day after school come home, take a shower and went to bed to avoid the chaos. On top of all the mess with my parents I had a pretty typical boyfriend. He was a high school jock who truly lived up to his title. He plaid sports all day, all year and talked about it all the time. I loved him, he lied to me and cheated over and over again. More Stress. Although I cried like a new born child leaving my suburban life style in Springfield, Massachusetts to attend a HBCU in Petersburg, Virginia was the fresh air I needed.

2003. This was not an easy year for me and those who know me already know this. 2003 I was 17yrs old, MVP of my high schools track and field team, my parents were going through a messy split and my boyfriend was a typical high school jock, unconcerned and sleeping with whatever walked. I was 120lbs pure muscle and off to college I went August 2003. (I'll post my prom pic soon as I get my scanner set up.)